Monday, April 30, 2012

Five Interesting Things About Star Trek

We learn where Scotty's middle finger is.

1. There's a bowling alley on the Enterprise.

There's a swimming pool on Deck 21 too.
According to the Star Trek blueprints there is a six lane bowling alley at the rear of the star ship on Deck 21. It includes spectator seating and a cafe. I guess it's for all of those Federation bowling tournaments. What Starfleet officer doesn't want to spend a relaxing evening knocking back beers and scoring strikes? I'm sure Spock has a good game, and he can't play multidimensional space chess every night. I do worry about when the Enterprise is bombarded by Klingons--you know--when everyone gets thrown around on the bridge? Does this mean there's unsecured bowling balls bouncing around the ship? Probably.

The bowling alley is mentioned on the episode The Naked Time. Everyone on the Enterprise gets drunk off of space water and goes crazy. One of the engineers takes command of the ship and declares a dance to held at the bowling alley. Unfortunately we never see this.

But we do see this.

2. Scotty can't flip off Romulans.

200 years of wrench advancement.
James Doohan lost his finger during World War II. Scotty was actually a Canadian officer that landed at Normandy on D-Day. It was shortly after this that he lost his finger. There are conflicting stories on how this happened. According to Doohan, the Nazis almost killed him. Wikipedia says that it was friendly Canadian fire. Whatever the case, Doohan nearly pulled an away-team red-shirt when he was shot at least six times. A wound to his finger resulted in it being amputated.

During the Star Trek series and movies, he disguised the fact that he was missing a finger, so it is rarely noticeable. It never came up during any story, and why talk about fingers when there were more interesting stories to tell about Scotsmen in space.

No stereotypes here. Move along.

3. What is Mr. Spock's first name?

Vulcan pon farr spot found.
Just like the word Ewok in Return of the Jedi, Spock's first name is never mentioned during Star Trek. At most it's alluded to as supposedly unpronounceable Vulcan in This Side of Paradise. Harold Spock has also been suggested.

Probably the best case we have is from a non-canon novel. By that reference his full name is S'chn T'Gai Spock, which sounds like something on the menu that you never order at a Chinese restaurant.

"Ladies, I'm in a band."

4. There's a Star Trek cereal.

Rockin' the eye shadow, Mr. Spock.

Yes and no. There have been plenty of tie-ins since the 60s. I mean, where else are you going to get space energy from? But wait! As of the new Abrams reboot, Kellogg's produced a new Star Trek cereal. Which is a lot like Lucky Charms--in space.

I'm sure a replicator could do better than this.

5. There's lyrics to the opening song.

Just about anyone who has had a television would remember the iconic Star Trek theme song. It's about :30 into the opening, after Shatner's monologue.


Yeah, the theme song to Star Trek has lyrics.
Beyond
The rim of the star-light
My love
Is wand'ring in star-flight
I know
He'll find in star-clustered reaches
Love,
Strange love a star woman teaches.
I know
His journey ends never
His star trek
Will go on forever.
But tell him
While he wanders his starry sea
Remember, remember me.
The theme song lyrics illuminate two things. First, Star Trek really is about Captain Kirk flying around the galaxy learning about "love" from green women. Second, Gene Roddenberry is kind of a dick. He wrote the lyrics so, through a contractual loophole, he could collect royalties every time the theme song is played. Like during a syndicated rerun.

Basically this screwed the composer, Alexander Courage, out of half of the royalties. This is at odds with Roddenberry's vision of a scarcity-free utopian future and I think someone owes a composer some gold-pressed latinum bricks.

And finally, how about some Turkish Star Trek?


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